Stolen Post

As always, I'm a bit surprised by my Canadian following. Maybe I'm funnier the further north you go... I don't know. But either way - Holla' to all of my Canadian readers.

HOLLA'!

One in particular, Sassy One, is a school teacher with quite the knack for hilarity.

So I'm taking my cue from her (altho, it was uninvited) and sharing with y'all my favorite joke.

Here we go:

(Disclaimer: I LOVE THIS JOKE! So tease me at your own risk.)

Y'all know the story of Cinderella, right? Well, there's another part of the story that's always left out.

You see, we have Cinderella all ready for her Ball. And rather than be happy and smiley and stoked, she's quite the opposite. She just stands there, a frown upon her face, looking very sad and pathetic.

Her fairy godmother turns to her and says "Cinderella, what's your deal? Why are you so sad? You have your dress, your glass slippers. I even rocked out that killer carriage for you. What's going on?"

Cinderella replies, "Oh Fairy Godmother. I'm sad because I'm cramping like a beyotch. I'm on my period and my feet are swollen and I'm bloated all to hell!"

"I see," says the Fairy Godmother. "Let's see what I can do."

Fairy Godmother goes back outside to the pumpkin patch... waves her magic wand..."Bibbidy Bobbidy Boo!"

She returns to the house and presents to Cinderella what she has created for her. "It's a Magic Tampon Cinderella. You got this baby and you will be good to go!"

"Oh, thank you Fairy Godmother." Cinderella rushes off to the bathroom and returns smiling and flushed. Her face bright with hope and excitement.

Fairy Godmother turns to Cinderella and reminds her "Now, Cinderella. Please remember that as all other magical treats, this too will turn back to its original form at the stroke of midnight. Do not forget. You must not be late."

Cinderella smiles. "Oh no, Fairy Godmother. I promise, I will not be late." And off Cinderella goes to ball. A skip in her step and a twinkle in her eye.

So the Fairy Godmother waits for Cinderella. She waits. And waits. And waits some more. Midnight rolls around... no Cinderella. It's 1:00 am and she STILL hasn't shown up.

Around 2:00 am Cinderella drags her ass home. Fairy Godmother is extremely upset at this point. She faces Cinderella and asks, "Where the hell have you been Cinderella!?! It's 2:00 am! You're late!"

To which Cinderella replies, "I'm so sorry Fairy Godmother. But you see, I was on my way home when I met this guy... Peter... Peter..................."

(The End.)

Ha! I friggin' love that joke. Maybe what made me love that joke that much more was when I shared it with my mom.

Mom: Huh? I don't get it.
Me: Uhm. Mom. The nursery rhyme.
Mom: Yeah. I know. Peter, Peter, pumpkin eater. But...
Me: Riiiiiight.....
Mom: OOooooooooh.
Me: Exactly. Funny, right?
Mom: ...

I think that about covers it. Enjoy.