Deep Throat

First off, let me assure you that this post has absolutely NOTHING to do with the Washington Post, Richard Nixon, or Mark Felt - and instead has everything to do bj's.

Ha! You wish.

So, let me take you back to December 31, 2003. I am celebrating the upcoming New Year with 50,000 of my closest friends and family in downtown San Antonio. It's jam packed with people (Mexicans), food, live (crappy) music, beer, and crazies (more Mexicans).

I was meeting up with a particular group of friends, mostly "the guys" and Stacy (don't think I've mentioned Stacy before, she's my ex-roommate and a very dear friend). I had sent them ahead w/a rolling ice chest (the coolest invention EVER) filled w/beer and a couple of bottles of cheap champagne. I finally make it downtown around 10:30pm, lucked out on parking, and amidst all the peeps, found my group of friends.

I was late, so I had a lot of catching up to do. So about an hour and some change, 4 or 5 beers, and two or three trips to the nearest porto-potties later... I was working on a very nice New Year's Eve buzz. I vaguely remember ringing in the New Year, taking obnoxious pictures, and commentating on all the what we'll call "elite" of SA.

I had to admit I probably shouldn't have, but I did indeed drive me and a friend back to the post New Year's party. Anyway, so under normal circumstances, that would be the end of the story. Sure a little on the dull side, but trust me, I'm not done yet.

So the next day or so I get a couple of calls. In fact, I think the whole process took about a week or so to die down. But here's what I heard:

From one of my mom's co-workers:
"Hey, were you downtown for New Year's? Yeah, I saw you on TV. You were wearing that black top w/jeans? Yeah, I saw you bending over for like 5 minutes. Were you puking your guts out all over downtown or what?"

From one of my co-workers (she was in Laredo at the time):
"Hey, I saw you on TV! You were walking with Stacy, then you stopped and bent over for like 10 minutes. Did you trip on your shoelaces?" Awww.
By the way, this is from my "nice friend". Picture the nicest, sweetest, most innocent person you ever met... uhm, yeah - that person is a bizatch whore compared to Grissel.

From my cousin:
"You were on TV. You looked like you were bending over, giving some guy head. It was hilarious! I think we got it on tape, wanna see it?"

Anyway. Yeah, I heard different variations of these for about a week or so. It was great. Just great. Worst and most annoying part is that I have NO IDEA why I would have been bending over for such a long time. I mean, if it was for about 45 seconds, I'd say it was because I was reaching for a beer from the cooler, because otherwise, I just don't know. Weird.