Godfather moment

I seriously had one last night. It was a little freaky.

Okay, so y'all remember the scene when somebody (I really don't know the movie very well, as you'll soon find out...) comes into their bedroom and there's a big ol' bloody horse's head on the bed? Yeah. That totally happened to me last night.

Only, it wasn't my bed. It was my front door area (like on top of my "Welcome" mat). And, ya know, it wasn't a horse's head. It was a decapitated bird.

But still...

Freaky shit, right?

Yeah. I know.

I'm pretty sure it was the neighbor's cat. He is known for his hunting skills. I wonder if it was his way of leaving me a "present". Regardless, I almost spewed when I saw it.

Okay, so now I'm standing there with a very dead bird in front of my door. What the hell am I supposed to do?

Well, I'm single... and therefore have no boy to call to come over and take care of my dilemma... So who can I call? Dad? Sure. But he would probably say "and what do you want ME to do about it?" To which I could have gotten all "But I'm your only child... Your ever-loving daughter..." up on him, but my Dad works a lot and it was already late.

Soooooo, I sucked it up. Grabbed my old mop and began to play field hockey with the bird carcass (eww).

My biggest fear was that it wasn't really dead and it would start to chirp at me or something. A ridiculous fear I realize as I could see guts and blood and whatnot. But still.

I was also a bit worried that in my rush to get this thing off my porch I would miss or swing badly and it would somehow come in contact with my person. Oh god that would have been awful.

*shudder*

But all is well. I took care of bidness.

And fortunately, when I left this morning it wasn't back on my front door step. Cause that would have REALLY messed me up.