By Thatgirl7278
I have horribly discovered (pre-op necessity here) what the WORSE thing known to man (or anus, your pick) is...
Magnesium Citrate.
This particular concoction (great word, say it with me "Concoction") was forced on me the night before my surgery. Oh sure, they tried to soften the blow by offering it in grape and cherry flavors, but... oh... my... god. I don't think my ass will ever forgive me. Seriously. I don't think it is even possible to walk past it in the drug store anymore without shuddering in fear and pain.
The crappy part (pardon the pun) is that my doctor told me I would have to drink two of them, if the first one didn't work (that is). Let me just say that had I consumed both of the bottles I purchased I would probably not be here today... blogging about this. For I would have done the unthinkable and committed suicide. Not funny, I realize, but pretty damn close to the truth.
In any case, I decided then and there that to serve it to someone would be the BEST (or should I say WORST) act of torture/mean ass trick you could ever play on someone.
So! Next time someone pisses you off or hurts you or anything similar, slip 'em some of this (I doubt it would take much) and take leave, because believe me you won't want to be anywhere near that person once it kicks in.
BTW - I happen to have an extra bottle - Cherry Flavored - if anyone is interested. I'd be happy to ship it anywhere. Well, within reason. Sorry, my Canadian friends.
Hmmm. Well, maybe if it was for a good cause.
Nah, I'd probably still hold off and just point you to your nearest drug store. That's just how I roll.
2 comments:
I'm so happy to see you back. 8 pounds! That is awesome, sorry you had to lose it the way you did.
talk to you soon.
Imagine the effects of that AND a round of Taco Bell!
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