March Madness

It's only the second day of March and here I am already going MAD (crazy, not pissed off)! I have a feeling it will be one of my most hectic months of the year - mostly because I have decided to work on average 69 hours a week until Easter.

Why am I doing this you ask? Because when Easter break comes 'round I will have 3 FULL DAYS OFF! That means for three whole days I will have to do NOTHING but sleep, do laundry, eat, and spend time w/my family.. and of course, go out, stay up late, hook up (if I so choose)... blah blah... all the other fun stuff that comes w/having time off.

This makes me VERY happy and is worth 3 weeks of working my ass off. I mean, it's only an extra 7-8 hours a week more than I am currently working. Pshaw ... BIG DEAL!

So... Patrick has decided to become more forward w/his "advances". He said he wants to take me away for an overnight visit to a really nice hotel somewhere... someplace where we can get "comfortable" is how he put it. He also decided that since I admitted I am a little bit less inhibited than the next gal (sexually that is) that he wants to take me shopping. Meaning he wants us to go pick up some porn and some "toys" and other "goodies" with which we will use on one another. I KNOW!! PRETTY FORWARD, RIGHT?!

Now, under different circumstances, I might easily agree. It HAS been awhile (er, 4.5 months). And I admit, he can be very persuasive or at least he sure can "paint a pretty picture" if you will - but I'm still a little bit unsure.

But I will also admit, I am intrigued.

Now although, I'm no prude - I'm also not THE most experienced gal on the block. I mean, sure I've got some crazy stories (remind me to mention a few one day) and who doesn't... but there is a lot (sexually) that I haven't done or tried. I'm pretty sure these new experiences he's suggesting would certainly cover a few of the things on the list of "Fantasies Unfulfilled" I have. And yet I still hesitate. I really need to figure out why I am hesitating though. I mean, it's not because I don't feel comfortable w/him. I actually feel pretty safe w/Patrick. And it's not as though we aren't two consenting adults out to enjoy one another's company.

And yet, there you have it... it just doesn't seem enough.

I know if there are any guys out there reading this, they are thinking "man, it's just like a woman to over-think too much" or to "over-analyze too much". But hey, this is my life. I mean, I don't want to do anything I'll regret (which is sort of my personality... I mean, I can't tell you the number of times I've had BUYER'S REGRET and that's just for stuff... just think how much it would suck to have SEX REGRET).

I will have to think about this a bit more... or at least tell myself that's what I'm doing. That way after I go ahead and do it (cause I probably will) then I can at least say "well, I've given this some thought and..."