...in bed.

I'm sure you've all done this once or twice. Gotten a fortune cookie from your favorite Chinese restaurant, read it aloud and at the end, added the phrase "...in bed". And if you haven't well then you're a boring freak who doesn't get out much and shouldn't be reading this blog. Please close the window immediately.

For those of you still with us... I wanted to share with you the following fortunes that I carry around with me at all times. And if you don't believe me FR, just ask to see my wallet and you'll know I speak the truth.

Disclaimer: Just so you know, I rarely throw ANYTHING away, so I have no idea how long I have had all these damn fortunes in my wallet. If I had a gun pointing at my face and it was forcing me to guess, I would say about 4 years. Besides, you never know when you need to know how to say "head" in Chinese (it's "Tou" BTW) or when you need some extra LOTTO numbers to get you through the hump.

Here we go:
1. You efforts will be worthwhile... in bed.

2. Practice is the best of all instructors... in bed. (And on that note, I am looking for new candidates, please form a line to your right.)

3. You will be called up to celebrate some good news... in bed.

4. Your destiny lies before you, choose wisely... in bed.

5. Your leadership talent brings you an incredibly opportunity... in bed.

6. Your odds for success will soon increase... in bed.

7. Opportunities surround you if you know where to look... in bed.

8. You are a bundle of energy, always on the go... in bed. (Ah yes, so true.)

9. Keep an eye open for an opportunity... in bed. (Too bad I rarely do keep my eyes open in bed.)

10. Good Luck bestows upon you. You will get what your heart desires... in bed. (Matthew McConaughey?)

11. A sweet surprise awaits you... in bed.

12. Others find your charm irresistible... in bed. (hell yeah they do!)

13. You or a family member will be married within a year... in bed. (NO!!!)

14. Union gives strength. Work collaboratively... in bed.

15. Now is the time to try something new... in bed. (hey, I'm open-minded.)

16. Find release from your cares, have a good time... in bed.

17. The best way to get rid of an enemy is to take him as your friend... in bed.

And finally...
18. Your ability to juggle many tasks will take you far... in bed. (Don't I know it!)

Lucky Numbers: 16, 21, 29, 31, 40, 41
Learn Chinese: Bean Sprout/Dou-ya